zombies

so we are like zombies here. It's been over a week that I've felt crappy but its been 8 days since I've been legitimately sick. Nothing seems to be working. Boo. We hit the doctor yesterday and its just a cold. No need for anything over then saline and/or ibuprofen/tylenol for the babies and over the counter crap for me. The girls are more cranky then anything else and of course snotty. I sound like I have consumption and possibly am dying. LOL Seriously my eyes are burning out of my head and I'm operating like a freakshow with my nasty cough.

on a better note, miss MV did ok with her vision test! we have to keep a check on her eyes every three months. They think that she is farsighted, which could explain some balance and depth perception issues. So thats awesome news.

Ro is desperately trying to crawl and sort of gets the backwards crawl thing going. It's so funny and amazing watching her get into the crawling position and rock and get super excited to move!!! Although I'm totally terrified for when she starts crawling and going all over the house! Atleast now she keeps the rolling to mainly the living room area!!

Nothing much else to report, being sick leads to a pretty boring life.

typhoid?

I feel like my house has become a typhoid central. We are all sick and it sucks. It's constant crying and wining from the babies and honestly, I wanna cry and wine too! My eyes are burning out of my head, I have a fever, the sweats, my ears and throat hurt. This is stinky. My hubs is sick too, and he NEVER complains about anything, so for him to be like "I'm sick" is SERIOUS! I mean the man breaks bones and carries on as though he suffered a minor scratch. The girls are snotty snotty snotty - in every sense. Ro is also teething, so in addition to the snot stream pouring out of her nose, the drool is soaking her shirts. It's quite cute, makes you want to hold her extra LOL. J actually said it was like picking up an eel today, she was wet and slimey. MV cries over everything, literally she just can't help it. I wanna jump on the floor and full blown cry it out with them - YES GIRLS THIS TOTALLY SUCKS! We need a babysitter - for Mommy too.

Well at least I think it will eventually get better - we can't have this funk typhoid cold forever, well at least I hope we can't.

We had to venture out today to get some milk, at some point my rations run low. I felt like a hot disaster in WallyWorld. I think everyone was staring at me. Maybe it was because I sounded like I had consumption with my cough or maybe because my black tee shirt was covered in baby snots. Hard to say really, either way it was an unpleasant sight for all. Sometimes I want to shout - yes I know I look like absolutely garbage, thanks for noticing. PS I feel like super shite too. Thanks for asking. hahaha but instead I take my items to the check out absorbed in my own self pity and move it along.

So MV's new dance routine is improving by the day, it seems to be the only thing that gives her joy while she is battling this vicious cold. Dancing to a ragged old St. Patrick's Day dog thing that dances to Hip Hop Hooray. She shakes her booty and throws her hands in the air and starts to do an imaginary hula hoop like motion and sometimes adds walking backwards (a moonwalk of sorts) into her routine. I really don't know where she comes up with this. Maybe after the 190,000 time playing the dog, the moves just come to her magically, she feels the beat I suppose.

Ro is starting to crawl, she props herself up and pushes away. Although she moves backwards faster, so she gets angry and rolls herself to the object of her affection. Usually MV's sippy cup or whatever toy was most recently launched on the floor. She really is growing up too fast.

Actually they both are, and as much as I joke and laugh, I try not to take them for granted. They are my absolute world and I enjoy every minute...even if it is snot covered. <3

do you make your own bed at a hotel?

Okay, so the other day - I was moaning and groaning to my Mom that Ro doesn't hold her own bottle 100% of the time. She holds it 25% of the time, which is irritating, because we know she is capable. I'm going on about how at 7 months old, she should try....etc. etc. My husband then chimes in "well why would she? do you make your own bed at a hotel?" I burst out laughing and its true. I'm my children's personal valet. I do everything for them and they know it. I'm 99.9% sure I birthed the laziest babies in America. MV was perfectly happy to let me cart her around until she was 18 months old. Quite frankly, I know she knew how to walk, she simply chose not to. Unbelievable. With a second lazy baby, I'm starting to see a trend and realize that maybe the Mommy is at fault for catering and not the baby. The valet service is apparently in full effect here.

We've all been sick for the last 4 days here. Not just me or the hubs but MV and Ro too. It's awful to be sick when its just yourself, but sick with 2 sick babies and a sick partner is just ridiculous. We're all coughing, sneezing and snotting in everyone else's face. No one is safe here. Everytime I turn around another baby is crying from general crankiness which immediately triggers the other one to chime in. I like to call this competitive crying. Crying for no reason other then to further my brain damage and emotional stress. I think at night they talk to each other and the conversations go something like this:

MV: Did you see her today? She lost it like 120 times?
RO: We almost made her cry at 7 different points - she's so pathetic.
MV: It's too easy. OK I think we should be nice to her tomorrow morning.
RO: Yeah, then we'll gang up on her at bedtime. hahaha - its too easy!
MV: YUP!

(and then they baby high five each other)

Okay, well maybe they don't plot exactly like that, but they definitely know my breaking points! And in the last 4 days, its been at an all time low. That said, surviving all 4 people in this house being sick, definitely is making me a stronger person (because it hasn't killed me yet)!!!

So MV's been on a dancing kick. I think she training in case soul train comes back. Cause she's got the motion in the hips perfect for disco. Meanwhile Ro is crazy in the jumperoo. It's hysterical to see her hair bounce up and down because its so long. Part of me cringes that she will bounce out and hit the ceiling (we have 30 ft ceilings) but girls got some jump!!!!

crafts? recipes?

Not much new here to report, I'm still as dazed and confused by life as ever. Ro is still acting as if she wants to be institutionalized and MV well, she's taken to shaking her booty like its a part-time job these days. Ro is so cute and happy until nap/bed time, she then morphs into a freakshow. It's frightening, her happy little smile because a mouthpiece of rage and screaming. Her scream pierces my soul and I find myself in a full blown panic at the sound of it. How can a little peanut upset a grown woman so quickly. I start to sweat and get tremors when her shrilling starts. I'm putting all my eggs in one basket and hoping against hope all of this screaming and craziness will end when those GD teeth finally break through. I really thought she would have 18 by now based on her behavior, but I think God is a trickster and he wants to see how much I can handle. MV found a St. Paddy's Day toy dog hidden craftily in her room (or so I thought) that dances while it plays "Hip Hop Hooray". Well John and I are using all our prayers that the batteries die. We just can't take them out, it gives her too much enjoyment, yet if it just dies, we won't be racing to replace them. She basically turns it on 980 times a day and stands in front of it dancing and laughing. Of course, she likes an audience. However if we are busy, Ro can generally fill in.

I was thinking tonight that I might start posting recipes once a week or some pics and ideas of the crafts I come up with. Allow me to be the first to say, my how the mighty have fallen. Babies screaming, babies dancing, crafts and recipes...WTF. 3 years ago I would have shunned this blog, certainly not have written it.

It's almost time for back to school! YAY! Increased business, which means increased kids cuts. Kill me now. Although I enjoy most of the kids, the little little ones irk me. Maybe its because I end up cutting the crap outta my owns hands while trying to spare their little ears and heads. And why you may ask am I getting cut up, oh yeah, its because they don't sit still, EVER. And then the mom's say - do you think that's even right there, maybe its just a bit longer right here. No, no actually I don't, quite frankly I know its not even at all, its definitely longer there. I wonder if you gave your child a red-bull before they came in with a side of little brat pills? Hmmmm, I'm also at this point fairly impressed your child has 2 eyes, 2 ears and no bleeding wounds (although I can't say that about my severed fingers while trying to spare your child's ear while they were bouncing up and down and their head was spinning around vomitting pea soup) - catch my drift. To my friends, a child under 5 may not get a perfect haircut. They will get the best haircut they can be given depending on how they behave. Also - be a sport, whether or not you support sugar - let your child have a FREAKING lolipop - its one time, for 5 minutes and it makes my job a HELLUVA lot easier!

nuttybean

So I'm wondering if a 7 month old can suffer from a personality disorder or even be bi-polar. Ro is a nuttybean. One minute she is jovial and laughing and the next she is screaming like a child that is possessed by the devil. I can't grasp it. She is so cute when she is cute, but if she feels the faintest twinge of hunger or tiredness - she's CRAZY. My brother was here last night and witnessed one of her personality conflicts last night. And I was fighting with an almost 7 month old. I was full on battling it out with her. I remained in my corner of you need to sleep its 10:30pm and she remained 100% dedicated to REFUSING to go down. Hmmmm, if dogs can go to psychs, I wonder if infants can? Perhaps I just need to CIO or lay down the lay.

MV's new trick, also slightly disturbing, running in a circle until you fall down. LOL

1 forward 2 back

Ro has napped a total of 30 min today. She is staring at me currently as I type, almost daring me to turn off the light and call it a night for her. She is a party girl, for sure. MV fights the sleep like a champ on rare occasion, but Ro full blown refuses to sleep. I've become a nap nazi crazy lady.

We walked around the neighborhood, let me rephrase - stood in front of my house for 2 hours rocking them in the stroller in the 300 degree weather tonight talking to the neighbors. The girls were awesome (because they LOVE LOVE LOVE the attention) and got to pet every single doggy that walked by! It was pretty nice except I appeared to have went swimming because I was so hot and possibly smelled like a bathroom in Penn Station! OMG its soooo humid here, it straight up offends.

Tomorrow I need to leave with both girls by 9am. I'm already starting to pack my stuff up. I am so not the mom, who gets it together by 9. I am the mom who has to plan 12 hours in advance. :)